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How to Deal with Hackers

Discussion in 'Unofficial Guides' started by 3pointone45, Sep 21, 2014.

  1. 3pointone45

    3pointone45 Popular Meeper

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    Since hackers are an evolving race in the minecraft world and because we do not let other opinions in, I will tell you how to deal with hackers so you can better the community

    Address them in chat

    This will show the hacker that you have a brain and you know what hacks are. If they say you are a noob or you don't know what hacks are. Keep yelling at them that they are a hacker. They will run off sooner or later.

    Use caps

    Caps are there for a reason, so they must be used to defeat your enemy. Once they see that you have the bigger lettering, they will run off because of how intimidating your wording is. If they are not intimidating they are obviously blind, so you will need to yell at your computer screen until they leave
    *Note* You can't have skype,mumble or ts3 opening or you will be brought down by the mafia

    Swearing

    The staff mafia doesn't want you to use words but the reason for that is because they want to feel more intelligent that you. When you see a hacker, curse at it with a lot of words or even in a language other then English. When the hacker sees that there is a Spanish player cursing at them with words that they can't understand, they will leave because of how intelligent you are(Warning) The hacker could be the same language.

    The Don't

    Reporting on the forums

    Reporting on the forums is a lie that only myself and a few other followers of the potato gods have found. We need to be independent and we can't rely on staff for every problem we have. Even if the server is getting Ddos it is better to handle it yourself

    Contact a Staff member

    The staff mafia is only out there to abuse people and apparently, abusing non-hackers is wrong to the eyes of the public. I do not see abusing any player is right by any means. We should do what all pre school kids do when they don't like someone and don't include them in our fun. Even if they are trying to hard just ignore them. They will run away to another server once they relies that they are not welcomed.

    Staying calm

    In old times, they believe that staying calm is the way to find any answer, but they still haven't found a way for eternal life. Because we live in a day that people need to get mad at video games, we now find it okay for someone to call another guy a lot of racist terms. So get mad in real life and tackle this problem head on.
    *Side effects* Ear getting suck in door, swelling in knees, fist threw computer screen, hippo eating your dog, failing 14th grade, you thinking that there is a 3rd gender.

    Last thing

    Once you have mastered all of these steps you are ready to fight a hacker. There are side affect though. If you see a staff mafia member then you have to be quiet. Even if it is hard to watch seeing them abuse the hacker you have to stay quiet. Then when they leave you can go fight him. Now there is a price to all of this greatness. You will find that you will be forgetting your pants everywhere. If it is somewhere in the middle of Poland or America, it is not publicly right to no wear pants. If you start forgetting to wear underwear please talk to a doctor immediately.

    Made by:
    Spongebob
    Goku
    Spiderman
    Jesus
    WoW sucks
     
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  2. coltsman1234

    coltsman1234 Well-Known Meeper

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    i'm dying
     
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  3. leodavinci9000

    leodavinci9000 Popular Meeper

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    *Face Palm*
    No. Just. No.
    You need to report them, and don't tell them that you recorded them in case you need more evidence.
     
  4. Godwnoface

    Godwnoface Celebrity Meeper

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    My new phrase.
     
  5. 3pointone45

    3pointone45 Popular Meeper

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    You will not grow independence, independence is good for you in the real world so you can protect yourself from ninjas.
     
  6. _Chef_Carrott_

    _Chef_Carrott_ Popular Meeper

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  7. leodavinci9000

    leodavinci9000 Popular Meeper

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    So what? I'll rely on my pokemon when I become a pokemon trainer.
     
  8. UglyUnicorn

    UglyUnicorn Celebrity Meeper

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  9. 3pointone45

    3pointone45 Popular Meeper

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    Excuse me but if I can kill a Salamance with an ice cube, then I could kill a another one with a knife. Learn how to be independant from our presidents from astro-hungry and when the time is right you can go send that Salamance to kill elmo.
     
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  10. Cookies713

    Cookies713 Celebrity Meeper

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    Please note I am also a follower of the potato god (highest Archangel to him) and it is the potato gods word that forums do only lie and you must report hackers.
     
    Toostenheimer likes this.
  11. 3pointone45

    3pointone45 Popular Meeper

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    You are a lie, You must follow that fries religion. Stop with the salt wars and I might believe you
     
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  12. Cookies713

    Cookies713 Celebrity Meeper

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    No, we literally created a Church of Potatoism ingame, and I am the Senior Archangel of Potatos
     
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  13. Toostenheimer

    Toostenheimer Legendary Meeper

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    [​IMG]
    The most important thing to do about hackers.. IS TO NOT SCREAM IN GLOBAL THAT THERE IS A HACKER!
    YOU RECORD THEM, REPORT THEM ON LE FORUMZ, THEN YA WAIT...
     
  14. 3pointone45

    3pointone45 Popular Meeper

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    You need independence from the ninjas!!!!! It is simple as doing a back flip with fire in your teeth
     
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  15. Toostenheimer

    Toostenheimer Legendary Meeper

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    Your logic is invalid. It is dumb. Independence from Ninjas...? Dafuq
    The little daydream stuff is nawt needed. YA NEED BRAIN THINKIN'
     
  16. roboticboy16

    roboticboy16 Popular Meeper

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    Can't you take a joke?
     
  17. Ducksfanwaterloo

    Ducksfanwaterloo Active Meeper

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    it werks, i 1nce cald hax on robo, nd he qiut. misin acmplshd!
     
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  18. Toostenheimer

    Toostenheimer Legendary Meeper

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    I can take a joke.
    Ya got a problem?
     
  19. roboticboy16

    roboticboy16 Popular Meeper

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    No, it just seems that your being too serious with this.
     
  20. Toostenheimer

    Toostenheimer Legendary Meeper

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    I haz bern 2 seri0uz weth ppl bein complete idi0tz whin Iy repert dem
     
    roboticboy16 likes this.

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