Helper Application from Lady_Hestia

I love to take a risky chance but I do not want to roll the dice for a repeat of last time. -1

 

Eh, can't say I have interacted with you a lot, but I did absorb quite a bit of that personality of yours.
You love drama, trash and back talk, etc... (just like me, but hey, I am not applying).

Sure, you could do the job of a helper just fine, maybe even excell at it, but so could a few others, who
are not a ticking drama bomb.

I mean, if the server is in need of an additional pair of hands to tackle the modreqs and doesn't mind
the occasional 'commotion' - let's call it that - sure. Maybe there'll even be interesting threads on the forums
for once. +1

 

Considering you were one of the key factors in the mass amount of bs a couple months ago, -1.

However, just like with all mistakes, they can and will be forgiven. I can see you back on the team in the future, but this is not that time.

 

Heyo Hestia!
So I'm at a neutral vote, though I lean more towards a -1 rather than a +1. Three reasons really, yet rather not say the 3rd reason due to it being of a personal opinion or thought (nothing really bad, just rather not say it at this moment). Of course, using a video format for your app is a great as well as creative idea, stands out from the other applicants that have also applied. Yet thats the problem. It stands out from everyone else. Sure, we all have our bests and our worse, your best being that you're better at presenting in voice rather than in print. But thats the thing; using a video format may just make others believe that you're trying to impress the staff as well as show that you're best fit for the position. Of course, anyone is allowed to do it, cause don't think there's a rule stating how a app should look like, but a format like this denotes what others do or try to write in their app. (One thing to note is that it would have been best to have provided the transcript before hand rather than including it right after someone mentions it; right when I saw the app, which was yesterday, it wasn't there and sadly, no offense, I was falling a bit asleep watching the videos, most likely due to the current state I'm in right now) The next reason is one you mentioned in your app: gossip. With all the problems that occurred before, I don't know if its the right time to apply due to that. Yes, its a problem that can be fixed easily, yet how will we know that it won't occur again in the near future? We all can go off telling people about stuff, and try hiding what should not be told, aka staff info, but we at times can get out of hand and tell those we think we should trust things we aren't suppose to.
You're a great friend Hestia, and your app is fine. Its just, as mentioned by Klitch above, that right now may not be the time to apply.
-/+

 

now I have time and a keyboard I can go into it a bit more

There was consistency with the drama starting and the white lies and the pushing onto other people that you were oh so clearly the best. Your attitude could be quite petty, quite often, and especially the desperation to get promoted while doing okay work and not listening too anything anyone told you was one of the worst parts of dealing with you. It wasn't really the modreqs specifically, although some for sure could have definitely have been resolved a lot better - It was really your attitude towards it. You would complain and ask for help quite often and sometimes you not being confident got the best of you and you made some silly mistakes. your knowledge of the server workings is nice and quite extensive, buuut there's a point where you look at this and go "Is that really what people care about" because you can ask pretty much any server question to any staff member and they will either know it or be able to easily figure it out.

There was just constant gossip, drama, he said she siad, did you know that someotherstaff messed this thing up hahahaha, oh wow, you would not let things go. It got ridiculous when it came time to promote a helper to mod, and it turns out it wasn't you, and you bloody freaked. Why didnt I get this, I'm working so hard, I'm one of the best on the team, I do more than that person, and it continued with every person promoted to mod before you, then when you got mod it changed to "I'd be such a good super!!" instead. You bring others down around you, although I'm not 100% sure that this is intentional in all cases, but in some cases especially in personal experience you've flat out tried to bring me down - and this is when we were on the staff team together and we were on good terms.

There was also of course the several things that happened after we were no longer friends that were clear attempts to hurt me. But yknow, no proof, whatcanyado.

I think you're like me. You know who to talk to to get what you need. You know what to say and where to say it, and how to say it, in order to get what you need. The problem is it's never good enough and you start to get impatient. I've seen you lie to people's faces and turn around and talk crap about that same person to me about literally the same thing. And also, like me, I can see you lying and you say not - and quite frankly I'm in the same boat where I literally forget how I've lied to people because I'm so used to doing it all the time and passing it off as nothing. It's what people like us do :3

There's too much drama, there's too many lies. There's a lack of trust in players and admins as well it seems, you can't get by with a pretty face anymore.

the server is too small to get away with this, everyone learns everything, do you not see what happened to me? c':

 

Totally understandable. I hope that if not now then some day I'll be able to earn back the trust of the community and team.

Transcript was definitely there the whole time. I made sure because I predicted that people wouldn't want to watch my stupid face for 15 minutes. I was having trouble formatting everything in the beginning but I promise it was there.
Otherwise I know where you're coming from and understand. I'd like to see how this application plays out and reassess what I need to personally fix before applying again. I really think I've made good process in my gossiping but I completely understand why you don't trust me as of yet. Do you have any advice you would like to give me as to how to improve and show that it's true?

--- Double Post Merged, May 26, 2017, Original Post Date: May 26, 2017 ---

I can't do anything but say sorry. I'm sorry. I can say that I didn't mean to or it was unintentional but I know you're smarter than that and know that even though it's true it doesn't make it ok. I value your opinion extremely highly and know you see through bs better than a lot of people. I don't think I can ever make it up to everyone, especially you because I really really admire you and feel terrible about everything that went on. I really want to improve myself, truly. This is outside of being accepted as helper, because that is less important than the relationships with the people I've made here. I don't want to better myself for this position, that's silly, I want to better myself for life and as a person. Thank you.

 

-1

After the first time you were demoted, for threatening Onis, you applied a second time with the reasoning and logic that you learned from your mistakes and were intent on rectifying them. You didn't do this, but set upon actions which were hugely destructive with a crap server that was nothing but a competitor.

I won't ask what will be different this time because the truth is people do not change, and the third time will be no different than the first two.

 

+1
Thanks for awnsering all my questions in-game.
Best of luck!

 

I remember a young lad who duped with admin powers and became a successful admin twice after


As for the app, while you get style points for the creativity, i don't think that will help here. From personal experience I think you would be a good staff member, but it seems that that recent history of you in staff is largely negative. You also didn't address the reason for all of these peoples worries(The other server, the drama, etc) in the application. I think you should take the time to do that instead of saying sorry constantly. They know you are sorry. Explain why it happened and why it is worth it to have you on the team despite the recent history. Maybe even remake the app.
In conclusion, I think you would be a good staff member, but maybe now is not the time to apply. see you soon hestia

 

+1

 

Heya For me it is going to have to be a -1 i just dont see this being the right time for you to apply.

 

are u all gonna deny hestia because of the drama she's clearly trying to get away from that happened a few months ago and downvote her because she was so ambitious for a promotion she worked harder than everyone else and it was crystal clear that she was the best mod at the time but her "desperation" overshadowed her hard work and undermined her good reputation

she was demoted 8 months ago and y'all are still complaining about how she lied to everyone and was super dramatic during her time as staff. don't take this personally kling but you were demoted for literally driving players out and look you came back to be a super. there's no reason hestia can't do the same. if a little petty (not to mention outdated) drama is the reason hestia can't get the chance while a certain other person is burning his chances at an interview and still getting upvotes for sucking up to staff i think this server needs to reevaluate itself even though it's still going downhill as always

(hbd hestia)

 

First off, that is very brave for posting videos and not an application, I wouldn't be able to do that (for my applications). That was amazing. Second, you seem to know the importance to succeed in being a reasonable staff member. Third, the history seems to be a little bit of a problem. Even though you promised to be better, that is usually the hardest thing to do. Even though it was in the past you can't erase it. Though saying that, everyone should have had a story or moment of their history they wished to erase and to be forgotten by everyone and/or themselves. Overall, I say you should be able to be given another chance at a staff member.
+5 For Bravery, and something way different to other apps.

 

Oops my bad

I don't understand what happened in Naturalis or anything before, but just don't be salty and don't cause drama, I predict that you'd know that by now.

I won't leave a vote but if you get accepted, I would expect to see none of that conflict.

 

I hate how everyone is constantly criticizing her every move. Like for example, just because she made videos, it's some sort of secret scheme to impress staff and prove she's better than other people. Every little thing has to be devious, doesn't it? No., so chill out lmao.
Anyways, Hestia, I haven't spoken to you too much, but when I have, you seem like a friendly and mature person. I was on the staff team with you for what I think was a little under a month, and you taught me a lot of what I needed to know on the team. You always took the chance to pitch in and help, and I personally thought you were one of the best on the team at the time. When you got demoted I was really confused and couldn't understand why, and only learned the reason a short time ago. The events that went down which lead to your demotion were a little strange and concerning, however, it looks to me as people are taking it way too far. It happened so many months ago, and we all have our 'days'. It's not fair to be held against that after such a long time and even when you've been improving. I literally see almost nothing wrong with accepting you for interview besides the fact that you started a bit of drama, and even so I still want you to get an interview. It was one little gossip session, get over it guys. Anyways, in my opinion, it's worth the risk. I highly doubt you'll do what you did last time, and even so, it's worth the risk. You possess a ton of the qualities this team needs, and with the way the server is going, they sure need someone like you. +1

 

So the reason I did the videos wasn't to be creative or different from everyone else. I sat down to write my application and realized I've already written down this information, it's not going to be different from the Hestia you've seen before. I've been here for three years, you guys know me. How can I explain myself in a way that maybe you don't know? I think I accomplished showing a side that hasn't been seen before. Do I expect extra points? Nope. I just wanted to make sure everyone knew who I really was whether that is good or bad.

 

In regards to all the drama caused, it takes more than one person to participate for drama to happen. Yes Hestia might have been the main cause of it, but no drama is entirely one persons fault. Had no one else participated, it would have never happened. However, this is where we evaluate you Hestia, not the others involved, so you're still going to be held accountable for those actions. I'm glad in your videos you went on to apologize for what happened, but I would have liked to have seen you make more reference to what happened.

You're obviously very self aware, a trait I'm sure many of us can appreciate. You also clearly value the importance of communication, whether it be by talking to someone on discord, in game chat, or even making a YouTube staff application. In this sense, both you and I are alike. I too am for the most part self aware, and highly value the ability to communicate ones ideas effectively. I'm glad we can relate in such a way as it gives me more of an understanding as to who you are in terms of your values. We also happen to share a lot of weaknesses, but I'll get into that later.

From my understanding of your previous run, you did do a good job in terms of the actual moderation aspect. I personally have no actual memories of that time, seeing as I wasn't around, but from what I can gather it was never that aspect that was troubling. When sharing your ideas, you need legs to stand on, and so pushing to be the best helper/mod can give you those legs. It seems that how others value on your opinion in your mind is contingent on your performance as a staff member, which is one key thing that drives you. This is not to say you wouldn't help out otherwise, but I think it's important for you to know that regardless of whether your a average helper, or an amazing mod, you're opinion holds value.

Taking a look at your weaknesses, you didn't really say too much about any of them. I would have much preferred you to have highlighted a couple of them and went a little more in depth, to really show how you plan to overcome them. I'll comment on on each of the ones I feel have the most impact on you and the ones I feel can have the largest potential negative impact on meep. I'm also somewhat basing my decision of their importance on the fact of how similar you and I actually are in this regard. We both share many of the same weaknesses, so I'll address the ones that I too find quite challenging to deal with.

Control Freak: One thing I really wanted to highlight about this weakness is your understanding in the chain of command. Very rarely do the upper staff make decisions without consulting the rest of the team, however understanding that they would have to do that sometimes is important. Understanding that while you might feel like your way is the best, arguing about it and making everyone unhappy is sometimes much worse than just dealing with an idea that isn't as good as yours. I feel that learning which times to argue your point and which times to let it slide is going to be a big one for you.

Narcissism: You said in the app that you "actually have no idea how to combat this", and so instead of telling you what I think can come of these tendencies, I'd rather just give you some tips that have worked for me. One way that almost always helps me is to take a step back and really think about the other persons approach. Simply thinking that their idea is different and therefore worse, doesn't actually help. Take a second to think about why they came up with that idea, or why they did something a certain way. Use this to try and understand why they would have made that decision. There are however going to be time where you are going to talk up about your feelings towards an opinion or idea and think yours is better. When it comes to that, understanding how to be diplomatic is very important. You don't want to start by putting them on the back foot, but rather make them feel comfortable talking to you. Saying things like "I believe your idea does have a lot of value, but building onto it..." or "I appreciate your contribution, however here is a different approach" will make it much easier to have get your point across without upsetting anyone.

Gossip: This is probably the most talked about subject of this thread, just because of how relevant it was in your last demotion. A lot of your other weaknesses tie into this one, which makes a lot of sense actually. Because of your narcissistic tendencies, you have a hard time accepting ideas other than your own. This in turn leads to you talking negatively about them and stirring up drama. I'm very glad that you've worked on fixing this by finding one specific person you can go to rant to, even if that person is a super. I remember back when I was staff in 2014 I did the exact same thing, and remember it helping me a lot too. Where I went wrong is that I started talking to more than just that one person about it, and it quickly spread. What I think will happen is that you will initially start off just confiding in that one person, but much like what I did, it will spread.

To conclude, after writing 7 paragraphs, my vote has shifted back and forth. Looking at the positives, you possess many qualities that would be a great fit for the team, and I believe you could bring in a lot of new ideas for us to incorporate. On the other hand, your reputation of causing drama among the staff proceeds you, and if it were to happen again, would definitely hurt the team. The thing that I believe was missing from your last time as staff, was someone to tell you that enough was enough. Not just say it to you, but actually sit down and have a conversation about how even though you were trying to help, it was making things worse. I believe this time around, we have a level of communication to where we will call you out on anything if need be, in a proper way, the same way we expect to be called out. If you wanted, I could even be the one helping you out in that department.

Overall, I believe that with the right assistance, you could make a very good staff member. +1

 

Accepted for interview!